Someone asked me to explain the advice from Jim Bregman I quoted in my previous post,
After all, everyone knows that ducks aren't really considered man killers (or, in my case, woman killers). The common explanation I have heard for this phrase is that while one duck won't make much of an impact, being swarmed by a constant flock of ducks biting you over and over can kill you.
Unfortunately, I have seen board members quit over the "ducks", those people who come to every single meeting, point out every single flaw you make. No matter how hard you work or how much grant money you bring in, how many families your program serves, how many people you employ, they are constantly pecking at you. No one is perfect and the ducks are there to point it out. Your newsletter had an error in the page numbering and you misspelled the name of the principal. They called you on Thursday and you didn't call back before the weekend. Never mind that most of the staff takes every Friday or Monday off and you haven't missed a day since the school was built. Someone stands up at a meeting and accuses you of mismanaging money even though there wouldn't BE any money if you hadn't brought in that contract. I could go on and on but you have plenty of your own examples, I am sure.
After a while, those really honest, competent board members, managers and other employees get sick of it. They throw up their hands, walk away vowing to get a job where they will be appreciated, not have their reputations attacked and never have to put up with these "ducks" again.
It takes a lot of persistence to outlast the ducks, to constantly remind yourself why you are doing this job, that no,you aren't a perfect employee or board member but you are a very good one and they are NOT going to win by running you out.
The second meaning of being bitten to death by ducks has to do with courage and it is one I just made up. If you have ever had a duck or goose run at you, you have probably jumped back at first out of reaction to something flying at you. If you think for a minute, though, you realize,
I was at a resort with my daughter when she was about seven years old. For some reason, a duck came running out and snapped at her. I did not have the usual reaction at all. I practically drop-kicked that thing and it certainly never came near my daughter again.
Often, the opposition and reaction that people fear is about as threatening as being bitten by a duck.
So? What is she going to do? Set your desk on fire?
Yeah, and what of it? You won't get invited to the Annual Team Player Banquet ? Very often, I have had to make unpopular choices, and I have found out two things.
A friend of mine laughed and said,
What are you afraid of? They're just a bunch of ducks.
"Don't let the ducks bite you to death."
After all, everyone knows that ducks aren't really considered man killers (or, in my case, woman killers). The common explanation I have heard for this phrase is that while one duck won't make much of an impact, being swarmed by a constant flock of ducks biting you over and over can kill you.
Unfortunately, I have seen board members quit over the "ducks", those people who come to every single meeting, point out every single flaw you make. No matter how hard you work or how much grant money you bring in, how many families your program serves, how many people you employ, they are constantly pecking at you. No one is perfect and the ducks are there to point it out. Your newsletter had an error in the page numbering and you misspelled the name of the principal. They called you on Thursday and you didn't call back before the weekend. Never mind that most of the staff takes every Friday or Monday off and you haven't missed a day since the school was built. Someone stands up at a meeting and accuses you of mismanaging money even though there wouldn't BE any money if you hadn't brought in that contract. I could go on and on but you have plenty of your own examples, I am sure.
After a while, those really honest, competent board members, managers and other employees get sick of it. They throw up their hands, walk away vowing to get a job where they will be appreciated, not have their reputations attacked and never have to put up with these "ducks" again.
It takes a lot of persistence to outlast the ducks, to constantly remind yourself why you are doing this job, that no,you aren't a perfect employee or board member but you are a very good one and they are NOT going to win by running you out.
The second meaning of being bitten to death by ducks has to do with courage and it is one I just made up. If you have ever had a duck or goose run at you, you have probably jumped back at first out of reaction to something flying at you. If you think for a minute, though, you realize,
"Hey, you're just a duck! I'm higher on the food chain. I could have you for dinner!"
I was at a resort with my daughter when she was about seven years old. For some reason, a duck came running out and snapped at her. I did not have the usual reaction at all. I practically drop-kicked that thing and it certainly never came near my daughter again.
Often, the opposition and reaction that people fear is about as threatening as being bitten by a duck.
"If I speak up in that meeting and say I don't think we should hire Donna's cousin because the other applicant is more qualified, Donna will be mad at me."
So? What is she going to do? Set your desk on fire?
"Everyone voted against the new policy but me. I really think it is a bad idea, it leaves too much opportunity for charging expenses to the tribe that you really shouldn't. If I vote against it, though, they'll think I am not a team player."
Yeah, and what of it? You won't get invited to the Annual Team Player Banquet ? Very often, I have had to make unpopular choices, and I have found out two things.
- These choices frequently turn out to be not so unpopular after all. There isn't a swarm of ducks. If you look at those people who are criticizing your grammar, spelling, hours and ancestry, they aren't forty-five different people. They are three people fifteen times each.
- Yes, making what I believe to be the ethical choice in the face of opposition has cost me the good opinion of a few people. However, not making what I believe is the right choice is going to cause me to think less of myself, and I am going to have to live with myself a lot more years than with anyone else.
"So I vote against those guys, what are they going to do, glare at me when I walk by and whisper behind my back?"
A friend of mine laughed and said,
"Honey, I hate to be the one to break this to you, but they already do!"
What are you afraid of? They're just a bunch of ducks.
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