Dr. Erich Longie
Grief is probably the most personal of all emotions. When a grieving person hears other people say, I know exactly how you feel, the first thought that comes to his/her mind is, how could you? No one can feel the way you are feeling and nothing anyone says or does will make you feel better.
On July 1, 2001, my beautiful son, Joel Mitchell Longie, was killed in a car accident so I had to go to the funeral home to identify my son. Joel was only seventeen years old. Some parents are said to refuse to accept the death of their child. With me, it was the opposite. Once I had seen his battered and bruised body at funeral home I knew he had left us for the Spirit World. Walking over to where he lay, I carefully closed his left eye, which was still open due to an injury he suffered in the car accident. Realizing his body would soon be cold, I caress him all over, and finally, I took his arms, wrapped them around me, and hugged him. While I held his body in my arm a thought occurred to me - Joel always listens to me. Although, I knew it was hopeless, never-the-less I had to find out if he would listen to me one time when it was so critical.
"Listen to me, wake up Joel, wake up my son,"
I told him. Of course, he did not wake up. I hugged him and cried until a deputy sheriff told me, I had to leave the funeral parlor.
Although it was very early in the morning, many of my family members and relatives were outside the funeral home, when I came out. They wanted to see Joel, but I told them the funeral director wanted to clean up his body before she allowed anyone else to view him. Informing them, I was driving to Dunseith, 100 miles distant, to inform Leona (Joel’s mother) I got in the car and left. While driving to Dunseith, my anger got the better of me and I began to talk to the Creator. This angry discussion with the Creator eventually became a poem that was put on his funeral cards.
Next, death of a child (continued)